It is positive. I have breast cancer

After the mammograms and ultra sounds and biopsy the results came back on 12 February – I have a grade 2 invasive ductal carcinoma. In plain words, breast cancer

Because I have private health insurance I could make an appointment with a private Breast Surgeon, which I had 2 days ago. He was calming and reassuring and I actually felt much better for the fist time since I received the diagnosis.

He is also very understanding, and although he made sure I knew it is not an emergency, I am booked in for a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy for Monday, 29 February

I have been positive this far, in the sense that I tell people not to worry and that it is nothing big and not to worry. But to be honest, I am not that positive within my self. When I get a headache my first reaction is ‘it has spread’; the same with a sore knee, a nose bleed, a cough – suddenly it feels as if my body is falling apart. It is hard to be positive within myself and my thoughts and I am so scared

I am also exhausted. Came home early from work today because I am really, really tired. Slept for about 4 hours and woke up still feeling tired. Things are getting to me and I feel emotional. And I don’t want to be strong for others anymore, I want to be able to show people I am scared, that I need support, that I am a wreck and just want to cry and cry and cry. And get this out of my body!!!!!!

 

 

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2 thoughts on “It is positive. I have breast cancer

  1. itworksbriana February 24, 2016 / 4:45 am

    Susan, I am so sorry to read about your diagnosis. My mother had cancer and it IS OHKAY to cry! You have every right to want and need support! I send my heart and good vibes to you this evening. If you need someone for support, I will gladly be a help. You can add me of facebook if you would like. My name is “Briana Nyleigha Blaze”

  2. The Eclectic Abuela February 24, 2016 / 4:47 am

    Your reaction sounds like a normal one. Being strong is great, but you need to talk with someone you trust, so you can let go and feel/experience your very natural fear of the unknown. I’m thinking of you.

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